It is easy to walk away than to make it work. When conflict arises in a relationship instead of resolving the conflict one is tempted to choose to walk away from it. But when you want your relationship to work you put some effort to resolve the conflict and make it work.
When we stay close and connected it is common to have disagreements and it is completely fine. There can be many reasons for disagreements in a relationship from minor everyday conflicts to serious issues.
Some common reasons for stress in a relationship include:
Loss of passion and attraction
Loss of finances
Emotional stonewalling and loss of commitment
Some stress in other areas of life may even impact one's relationship.
Conflicts in our day-to-day life, be it with friends or family members are all common and the stress from it can be contagious and affect our relationships but what we need to learn is to resolve conflict in all areas of our lives so that we can help our relationship and keep it going.
Here are some effective ways to resolve conflict in a relationship.
Change your focus:
When you focus on building a passionate and healthy relationship this is what you will achieve. Disagreements are okay unless you make them harmful by focusing on defending yourself from attack rather than on solving the problem. If you focus on pain and suffering you will attract those and will even experience the same because what you focus on, your energy flows in that direction. By changing focus, you can change the results. Focus on creating a beautiful and passionate relationship and don't waste your energy on anything that brings negativity to your life.
Communication is the key:
When you come across a conflict, how you handle it with communication defines what is the outcome. For example, even the slightest conflict can either make things worse when proper communication is missing or even the biggest conflict can be resolved with proper communication. A little bit of understanding and proper means of communication can be an effective way to resolve conflict in relationships.
Turn conflict into opportunities for you and your partner to align outcomes and values:
When conflict arises you can turn it into opportunities as they are chances to appreciate, understand and embrace differences. Whenever such situations come, try to put yourself in your partner's place and make an effort to understand their experience. When you do that you will see situations from a different perspective thus. it will help you to resolve conflicts.
These opportunities will help you to learn more about your partner and love them on a deeper level. Next time when you disagree with your partner, choose to see the brighter side of the situation and decide to work for a better future together.
Ask the right questions:
If you are pondering on how to save your relationship there is a high chance that things have been going wrong for some time. Start asking the right questions to dig into the past to uncover the real deeper issues or even the things that are causing stress to your partner in the present ot things that are creating problems in your relationship. By asking those questions try to find the answers together or a solution that can help both.
A shift from complaining to gratitude:
When there is a conflict you don't heat up the argument by digging up old arguments or telling your partner all the things they do that annoy you or playing a blame game. Instead, you must change your mindset from all this to acceptance and gratitude. No matter what the current state is remember it is presenting you with the chance to learn and grow and it is possible only when you want to work to save your relationship.
When your trust is broken you feel hurt, bitter, angry, mistrustful, betrayed, and a lot of other negative emotions follow. And if you are the person who broke the trust you may feel ashamed and guilty. Let yourself feel it but don’t let it consume you. When such situations come up there may be blame game or arguments to justify your actions but if you want to save your relationship, all you need to do in this situation is to work on forgiveness. Forgiveness takes time, it is a process and you can't just wake up one morning and forgive your partner. You can start it will a series of small acts like acknowledging your actions, admitting your mistakes, and practicing total honesty or by taking full responsibility and giving them the time and space they need. And always remember that communication is a must so continue to communicate and never give up. Take time but build that trust in your relationship again.
If nothing works, use humor:
A good way to break the pattern when you find yourself in a retaliatory spiral is to use humor. One way to save your relationship is by using humor as humor releases tension and allow you and your partner to focus on what you want.