No matter whom you are dating or are in love with, parting ways, breaking up does bring a sort of pain, reason varies from person to. Depending on the journey your emotions may vary but usually one finds it painful. Breaking up is hard but breaking up with a narcissist is harder. It is because, by the time you reach a breakup point, you feel frustrated, there have been lies, deceit, rage, anger, and all kinds of negative situations.
The other thing about it is that while breaking up with a narcissist, you have reached that point where you had tried everything they could to keep that or change the person. You kept trying which made you feel exhausted. You may find it hard to leave or may decide to break up with a narcissist is that they think the moment they leave, the narcissist is gonna change and be better for the next person which probably won’t happen.
And it is even observed that narcissists trade in a new relationship very quickly as relationships are very superficial for them. They might shift so quickly that you don’t know how to deal with it, it’s really destabilizing for a person. In other cases, it may even happen that after breaking up, the narcissist may go to love-bombing, they do something like hovering which means sucking the person back into a relationship. They start telling things that you ever wanted to hear, all kinds of good things. And here many people fall back to it.
When you leave a narcissist either hovering might happen, it doesn’t always but it might or you be traded out really quick, like replacing you with someone too quick which can hurt. It may even happen that they may start spreading lies about you to your close ones or the people you know or stalk you or harass you through social media and this can traumatize a person after they leave a relationship.
People who leave or decide to leave a narcissist, they might be thinking about it for a long time, like it is a very slow process from trying to be free from these relationships. It is going to be messy, it is going to be painful no matter what. A narcissist doesn’t like to be left so they are going to fight or be revengeful. It might usually happen that even a narcissist can leave because they trade partners, they replace them, they think about nothing but just switch to next. A narcissist will not leave a relationship unless they are seeing someone or someone is already waiting in line. And when a narcissist leaves the person instead of feeling lucky they usually feel abandon.
People usually feel that if a person doesn’t want them, it means that the person is very valuable but this is not the case. A narcissist lacks empathy which makes it difficult for them to feel the pain of others. So, don’t hold any negative feelings for yourself for breaking up with a narcissist. Give time to heal.
And overall, breaking up with a narcissist is going to be messy and painful but staying with them is going to be harder.
If you need any advice or help contact a psychologist.
Recommending Psychologists and Therapists are:
1. Life Coach Steffi Prasad - Psychologist & Therapists - Utopia Life Coach in Siliguri, West Bengal, India.
2. Khusboo Tomar - Psychologist: Centre for Forensic & Clinical Psychology